In the pursuit of any challenging goal, even one you choose on your own, you are likely to face a fair share of second guessing and self-doubt. Even the most talented goal achievers experience doubt and concern, smooth pacing interspersed with rough waters. Here’s how to sail right on through to completion.

Keep the End in Sight

Many people feel if they don’t enjoy the means, then the ends can’t be worthwhile, so they stop short of reaching their goals. But what worthwhile goal doesn’t have its share of drudgery in the quest for its attainment? The key is to revel in the drudgery.

Think back to an activity that you experienced over a prolonged period of time, such as attending and finally graduating from college. While you were in college, it seemed as if you would never get to the final semester and the final exam in the final course. Then one day it came, and poof, you were out. Aren’t you thrilled to be out of college today with a degree (if that was the path you chose)?

Whatever blood, sweat and tears you braved through on the path to what you wanted, revel in them, for they were yours. If you can’t see that now, trust that one day you will.

Hardly anyone can maintain a constant pace in pursuit of anything. That’s easily understood. What if you don’t enjoy the particular task at the moment, i.e., you’re going through the drudgery just described above? If so, notice your energy level:

• How do you feel about your intended outcome?
• How will you feel when you’re there?
• Did your energy rise a little?

Breathe

If you get wrapped up in your pursuit, sometimes you stray from the basics of what it takes to stay in the saddle. Still, you get to take a deep breath whenever you want. You get to drop back and relax on occasion. You get to take a shower, you get to take a nap, you get to go to sleep at night, and you get to start again. Why?

You’re not some puppet dangling on a string, forced by a puppet master to proceed at breakneck speed with no sense of ownership of your goal. In fact, proper breathing techniques are essential for entertainers, trainers, speakers, athletes, orchestra conductors and piccolo players, mothers in labor, presidents giving State of the Union Addresses, and everyone in-between.

Don’t Always Expect Perfection

In How Good Do We Have to Be?, Rabbi Harold S. Kushner says, “Life is not a trap set for us by God so that He can condemn us for failing. Life is not a spelling bee where no matter how many words you’ve gotten right, you’re disqualified if you make one mistake. Life is more like a baseball season where even the best team loses one-third of its games and even the worst team has its days of brilliance. Our goal is to win more games than we lose.” Most of your goals don’t require perfection either. They may require constant progress, but something far less than perfection in the pursuit.

If you find yourself with an array of goals that seemingly require perfection, remember whose goals they are–they’re yours. You can loosen the screws a tad and give yourself some slack. Indeed, in some cases, you won’t make it otherwise. If your goal is to lose X number of pounds in so many weeks, and only perfect discipline, perfect meals, perfect calorie intake, perfect exercise and so on will get you there, you will not get there.

You’d be better off to give yourself more time to allow for the fact that perfection not only isn’t necessary in this case, it’s not desirable, and worse, can prove to be counter-productive. Here are some clues as to when you may be striving for perfection and it isn’t necessary:

• You’re frequently gritting your teeth.
• You’re not able to maintain your normal demeanor.
• You feel easily frustrated.
• You’re not sleeping as well as usual.

Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

If the goal is truly your own, then you can proceed happily without being sidetracked by the accomplishments of others. All too often, people pursue things that they see other people have achieved.

For example, if you want a huge house simply because there are people in your town who live in huge homes, you may one day find yourself sitting in your mansion feeling very alone. The goal of wanting a large home has to be your own and has to be connected with positive reasoning. Perhaps you want room to build a large playroom for your children. Perhaps you’ve always wanted a guest bedroom. Perhaps you always wanted to have your own personal library and will need lots of room to store your thousands of volumes.