Overly Nurturing Your Nature
The future will unfold at a rapid pace. Perhaps there’s nothing quite as stressful as attempting to be someone different than you really are. It takes a great deal of energy, the kind that’s analogous to having the electricity turned on way too high for your radio, your light, or your PC, to maintain the posture of someone you’re not. It’s less stressful to give in to who you are.
This is not such a bad thing.Longitudinal data on identical twins separated at birth, but reunited later in life, shows that genetics may have more to do with personality than we previously allowed ourselves to believe. Lawrence Wright, reporting on research on twins in The New Yorker, says that the latest findings suggest that, “The life experiences we think have shaped us are little more than ornaments or curiosities…and that the injunctions of our parents or the traumas of our youth which we believe to be the lodestones of our character may have had little more effect on us than a book we have read or a show we have seen on television.
“Wright believes that if identical twins, growing up alone, can “sort through the world of opportunity and adversity and arrive at a similar place, then we may as well see that as a triumph of our genetic determination to become the person we ought to be.” Do you get bent out of shape when traffic moves along at four miles an hour? Chances are you always will. The key is to not get so bent out of shape that it does internal damage. Or, that it upsets your experience of the day.
You’re in a job that you enjoy, but the pressure can be unbearable at times? You don’t need to quit your job, but to learn measures of control that enable you to stay at a more even keel more times throughout the day.
After reading this paragraph, I want you to put down the article and undertake the following exercise. Sitting in your chair, focus on different areas of your body. Where is there tension? In the back of your neck, in your shoulders? That’s common for people who work at a desk. Does your back ache? Is your stomach tied up in knots? Wherever you’re feeling discomfort, be it a headache, a backache, or what have you, it is your body’s way of signaling that your not getting the rest, relaxation, nutrition, or some other element it needs to operate more effectively.
Does the typical baby walk around with a frown on his face, fretting over what he didn’t get done today? The natural state of the human being is alertness, health, and well-being, punctuated by regular, even breaths; mental clarity, and, I dare say, a tinge of happiness. Okay, so what can you do right now?
Here are a variety of ways to reduce some of the stress you experience in your life, starting with some simple maneuvers moving up to the more involved or costly:
* Drink water. Half the time, when you’re under stress, simply taking a sip of water will immediately make you feel better. A dry mouth seems to accompany many types of anxious situations. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate.
* Sit still. For the next minute, stare at your watch, or if that’s too boring, think about something pleasurable you’re going to do today. Your perception of the length of a minute will differ vastly from using that minute to listen to the news or read a page from a magazine. Alternatively…
* Twist and shout. Obviously physical movement is helpful. You can take a walk around the block, stretch right within your office, and use the stairs instead of the elevators. After work, blow off steam by going places where it’s okay to yell — sports bars, baseball games, conventions, or pep rallies. By the way, when barreling down the highway alone in your car, some therapeutic yelling there will also help to reduce stress as well.
* Improve your posture. Have you noticed that you begin to slouch when you get a phone call, or you slink further and further into the easy chair when you watch television? The body was made to be upright and erect. When you talk, eat, walk, and sit with full and proper extension, your systems work better and minor stresses melt away.
* Contemplate pleasant thoughts. Whether it’s a waterfall, the picnic you had last Sunday, what it will be like when you’re with your lover next, or getting a $10,000 check in the mail, visualization can calm the mind and soothe the soul. You don’t have to get heavily into meditation or yoga; simply develop the ability to take two to five minutes out of your day to peer out the window, or simply close your eyes. Get into a quiet space, and feel good about aspects of your life.
* Use visualization. Tomorrow morning when getting ready for work, rather than switching on the radio or TV, quietly envision how you would like your day to be. Include everything that’s important to you — the commute, entering your building or your office, sitting down at your desk, handling tasks, and taking breaks. Envision interacting with others, going to lunch, conducting or attending meetings, using the phone, finishing up projects, and walking out in the evening. With this exercise alone, you’ll begin to feel a greater sense of control in aspects of your job that you may have considered uncontrollable.
* Buy a hand gripper. A tennis ball, a racquetball, or a hand-gripper at your desk is a marvelous stress reducer. Squeeze it when you feel tense to achieve a release. This action responds to adrenaline in your bloodstream by getting your muscles in action.
* Buy a joke book. If The Lighter Side by Gary Larsen or Kathy by Kathy Guisewhite brings a smile to your face, keep such cartoons within easy reach. One good laugh, and your whole temperament can change, plummeting the stress you feel back down to manageable levels.
* Build slack into your schedule. A paradox among accomplished people is that the more they achieve, the more they believe they can achieve, and with less effort. If you think something is going to take two hours, plan on it taking three and schedule accordingly. This is a great stress reducer. If you finish in far less than three, fine.
* Volunteer. Serving others helps you to increase your self-respect and sense of accomplishment. Studies show that volunteers actually add years to their lives. When you stay in isolation, your worries intensify. So, serve soup or, pick a cause. Choose one cause or one issue and take some kind of action outside your home. There is little utility in intellectually resonating with the world’s challenges and problems. Action is customarily invigorating. Your ability to make a real, if minute, difference will immediately lessen your concerns about attaining some breathing space.
* Reduce some of your costs. Living beyond your means is one of the most stressful forms of existence in our society. What can you do right now to eliminate some onerous monthly expenses? Can you trade in your car? Can you sell vacation property? Can you eliminate subscriptions? Take a look at what you don’t need.
This is not such a bad thing.Longitudinal data on identical twins separated at birth, but reunited later in life, shows that genetics may have more to do with personality than we previously allowed ourselves to believe. Lawrence Wright, reporting on research on twins in The New Yorker, says that the latest findings suggest that, “The life experiences we think have shaped us are little more than ornaments or curiosities…and that the injunctions of our parents or the traumas of our youth which we believe to be the lodestones of our character may have had little more effect on us than a book we have read or a show we have seen on television.
“Wright believes that if identical twins, growing up alone, can “sort through the world of opportunity and adversity and arrive at a similar place, then we may as well see that as a triumph of our genetic determination to become the person we ought to be.” Do you get bent out of shape when traffic moves along at four miles an hour? Chances are you always will. The key is to not get so bent out of shape that it does internal damage. Or, that it upsets your experience of the day.
You’re in a job that you enjoy, but the pressure can be unbearable at times? You don’t need to quit your job, but to learn measures of control that enable you to stay at a more even keel more times throughout the day.
After reading this paragraph, I want you to put down the article and undertake the following exercise. Sitting in your chair, focus on different areas of your body. Where is there tension? In the back of your neck, in your shoulders? That’s common for people who work at a desk. Does your back ache? Is your stomach tied up in knots? Wherever you’re feeling discomfort, be it a headache, a backache, or what have you, it is your body’s way of signaling that your not getting the rest, relaxation, nutrition, or some other element it needs to operate more effectively.
Does the typical baby walk around with a frown on his face, fretting over what he didn’t get done today? The natural state of the human being is alertness, health, and well-being, punctuated by regular, even breaths; mental clarity, and, I dare say, a tinge of happiness. Okay, so what can you do right now?
Here are a variety of ways to reduce some of the stress you experience in your life, starting with some simple maneuvers moving up to the more involved or costly:
* Drink water. Half the time, when you’re under stress, simply taking a sip of water will immediately make you feel better. A dry mouth seems to accompany many types of anxious situations. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate.
* Sit still. For the next minute, stare at your watch, or if that’s too boring, think about something pleasurable you’re going to do today. Your perception of the length of a minute will differ vastly from using that minute to listen to the news or read a page from a magazine. Alternatively…
* Twist and shout. Obviously physical movement is helpful. You can take a walk around the block, stretch right within your office, and use the stairs instead of the elevators. After work, blow off steam by going places where it’s okay to yell — sports bars, baseball games, conventions, or pep rallies. By the way, when barreling down the highway alone in your car, some therapeutic yelling there will also help to reduce stress as well.
* Improve your posture. Have you noticed that you begin to slouch when you get a phone call, or you slink further and further into the easy chair when you watch television? The body was made to be upright and erect. When you talk, eat, walk, and sit with full and proper extension, your systems work better and minor stresses melt away.
* Contemplate pleasant thoughts. Whether it’s a waterfall, the picnic you had last Sunday, what it will be like when you’re with your lover next, or getting a $10,000 check in the mail, visualization can calm the mind and soothe the soul. You don’t have to get heavily into meditation or yoga; simply develop the ability to take two to five minutes out of your day to peer out the window, or simply close your eyes. Get into a quiet space, and feel good about aspects of your life.
* Use visualization. Tomorrow morning when getting ready for work, rather than switching on the radio or TV, quietly envision how you would like your day to be. Include everything that’s important to you — the commute, entering your building or your office, sitting down at your desk, handling tasks, and taking breaks. Envision interacting with others, going to lunch, conducting or attending meetings, using the phone, finishing up projects, and walking out in the evening. With this exercise alone, you’ll begin to feel a greater sense of control in aspects of your job that you may have considered uncontrollable.
* Buy a hand gripper. A tennis ball, a racquetball, or a hand-gripper at your desk is a marvelous stress reducer. Squeeze it when you feel tense to achieve a release. This action responds to adrenaline in your bloodstream by getting your muscles in action.
* Buy a joke book. If The Lighter Side by Gary Larsen or Kathy by Kathy Guisewhite brings a smile to your face, keep such cartoons within easy reach. One good laugh, and your whole temperament can change, plummeting the stress you feel back down to manageable levels.
* Build slack into your schedule. A paradox among accomplished people is that the more they achieve, the more they believe they can achieve, and with less effort. If you think something is going to take two hours, plan on it taking three and schedule accordingly. This is a great stress reducer. If you finish in far less than three, fine.
* Volunteer. Serving others helps you to increase your self-respect and sense of accomplishment. Studies show that volunteers actually add years to their lives. When you stay in isolation, your worries intensify. So, serve soup or, pick a cause. Choose one cause or one issue and take some kind of action outside your home. There is little utility in intellectually resonating with the world’s challenges and problems. Action is customarily invigorating. Your ability to make a real, if minute, difference will immediately lessen your concerns about attaining some breathing space.
* Reduce some of your costs. Living beyond your means is one of the most stressful forms of existence in our society. What can you do right now to eliminate some onerous monthly expenses? Can you trade in your car? Can you sell vacation property? Can you eliminate subscriptions? Take a look at what you don’t need.
